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Self-Confidence is Fundamental to Everything, But What is the Source of Self-Confidence?

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fundamentals of self-confidence

If you’re here, you have at least one question on your mind that you want the answer to. Is improving self-confidence possible, and if so, how? 

If you want to get anywhere in life, doing all the things you want to do and seeing all the things you want to see, you can’t do it while missing one of the key elements which is self-confidence. One’s experiences influence one’s perception of the self. A child that has been brought up from an early age believing they can achieve anything they will tend to grow up with a generous amount of trust in their own abilities.  

Not all of us are so fortunate. Facing failure at an early age without being able to bounce back from it can lead to poor self-esteem. Our inner critic constantly uses these little incidents to make us question our self-worth. The lack of confidence can lead a person to back out from situations, growing incredibly anxious in public events, or even making mistakes in things they already know.  

However, we have all seen numerous examples showing that one’s attitude as a child does not completely determine their path as an adult. It means, there is a way to quiet that inner critic and build up one’s self-confidence as an adult. The path may be more complex at a later age, but it is certainly possible to develop and maintain higher self-confidence.  

With the right guidance, support, tools and desire to live a happier and healthier life overall, you can build a new mindset, and with that, you can change your experiences. 

For some, it may take years of practice, but eventually, we can all reach a stage where we intrinsically believe in ourselves and where we need not consciously remind ourselves of our worth.  

Basically, that is the state where you can confidently say you have a good sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Naturally, we all have our ups and downs, and we don’t feel confident all the time. Such moments, when you start questioning your abilities are also helpful, so listen to yourself. Listen to your mind. This is where it all starts. Those moments, when you waver, indicate which situations you may have trouble with, what your triggers are and which skills you need to work on.  

Building up your self-confidence might sound difficult, especially if you have very little belief in yourself right now. But after experiencing the first quick improvements, you will have something to build on. Do not underestimate small results.  

We prepared some easy to implement tips to help you start your journey and build your confidence.  

 1. Visualization

Visualize yourself as who you want to be and how your life will look like once you have more confidence.  You don’t have to imagine yourself all successful, be realistic and visualize the next stage of development. With time, you will and can be bolder.  

Often, we suffer from poor self-image. By imagining yourself as a confident, capable person, you can open your mind to new ways and new thinking. New ways which you are not choosing yet because you don’t believe you can do it. Experiment and keep your risks at bay.  

Are you not confident to ask for help from an experienced colleague or be a part of that project where you could prove your abilities just yet? Visualize various scenarios, practice what a confident person would say. Collect your thoughts, relevant experiences, and examples of similar situations. This is what confident people do. They rely on their past results and experiences. They rely on their skills. You have skills; we all have skills; you are no exception. The difference is that you haven’t recognized your skills yet, or you have no reference point. Find yourself the first reference point. A problem you can solve. 

Click the link to learn 5 Ways you can use relaxation and visualisation to help advance your career

2. Affirmations

We tend to beat ourselves up for the smallest of mistakes far too often, but rarely do we remember to compliment ourselves for the things we do well. When you know you are good at something, make it a point to remind yourself of that. Say it out loud, do not be shy. It is true for you; it has already been proven. You have proved it.  

It may sound strange first to hear your own voice saying, I tackled that interview and got the job I have been dreaming about. But it will give you a sense of pride and closure too. Knowing that you have accomplished something as a result of your talent and effort.  

I recall the first time I did that. I didn’t even state my achievement. Also, I said it as if it was a question.  

This method can apply to your physical insecurities as well. The next time you look into the mirror, compliment yourself. Compliment yourself out loud, for features of your appearance you are proud of. It can be anything, and you may be proud of your shapely eyebrows, nice smile, you can even compliment yourself for your hairstyle that day. 

Similarly, do not forget to compliment yourself for your mind, resilience, and perseverance. Compliment yourself for your dreams and plans. Without them, you wouldn’t make any progress. Dreams and plans are fuel to your growth.  Appreciate your own qualities with conviction, and your self-confidence will have no choice but to follow. 

3. Challenge Yourself

Do something that makes you uncomfortable. Start small, and this is not a competition. Your development and happiness are at stake. Others have no say in it. Listen to advice and opinions but know that you live your own life, and no one else lives it on your behalf. 

I know some would question this advice. Why would I start small? Why not be bold?  I can tell you if you ask these questions, you probably have enough self-confidence in that field, so find another challenge for yourself. 

By facing a difficult situation head-on, your heart will finally start believing that you can do anything you set your mind to.  Also remember, facing it head-on does not mean you have to rush into it. You can still craft your plan and progress at your own pace.  

4. I mentioned this already. Start Small

Often, we set ourselves on a course for a nearly unachievable aim, and when we are unable to meet it, our confidence takes a hit. Instead, break down your larger long-term aims into goals and those into smaller, short-term objectives.  

After achieving your objectives, make a list of those achievements, no matter how small you believe them to be. This will help reaffirm your faith in yourself, and eventually, you will have achieved your goal as well. 

5. Personal Boundaries

It is okay to say no to other people. By setting personal boundaries and doing things that make you happy, you will be more in control of your life. Naturally, this will improve your perception of yourself.  

Follow these five techniques, and soon, you will be the person you always wished to be.  

Related articles
What does it take to be confident?
Benefits of Believing In Yourself.

 

Cover photo by Victoria Heath on Unsplash

Spending Time and Money on YOURSELF is a Way Forward

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investing in yourself is the way forward

When you get your paycheck at the end of the month, what’s the first couple of things you do? You probably get started on the bills and rent and send some over to your parents while the rest goes into savings.  

While this is definitely the right way to go about it, strictly in terms of saving, investing in yourself can take you farther ahead. If you want to rise beyond the person you are right now and witness some actual changes, then you have to invest time and money in yourself!  

If this was such a glorious idea, then why don’t more people do it? And you’re not wrong to wonder about this. Most people believe that investing time and money in oneself  can’t possibly be a way to ‘success’.  

To prove this train of thought wrong, here are some ways to invest in YOU that can help you out in the long term and even give you a little push forward.   

 1. Developing Professional and Interpersonal Skills  

Your job proficiency and technical skills may be far superior than those around you. But how can that be if you’re better at your job? The difference is that having the technical skills can only get you so far. Real progress comes in when you display professional and interpersonal competence.  

Professional and interpersonal skills include those traits that people at the workplace must possess in addition to the technical know-hows of a job. If you’re confident about the way you do your job, then all you need to brush up on are professional and interpersonal skills.  

Communication falls under this category. No matter what position you’re at, communication will always be a vital skill that you’ll require. Any form of interaction between your subordinates, superiors, and yourself should always respect professional boundaries and be concise and clear. Remember that proper communication is a reflection of your professionalism as well!  

Take some time out to enhance your character. To make yourself stand out amongst a crowd of employees, brushing up on such abilities, like working just as well under pressure, exhibiting leadership qualities, or self-motivation, is definitely worth your time and will push you forward.  

 2. Generic Versus Specific 

We’ve discussed how you can invest time. However, here is how you’re supposed to put money to good use. The real return on investment is when you take a risk. And by this, we mean that you should focus on things that can further help you attain professional and interpersonal growth.  

Competition nowadays is only rising and all your coworkers are trying to make real progress just like you. But what can really set you apart is investing money in developing your skills.  

If there’s a class in town about how to lead people in a business, go for that class. If a website tests your conflict resolution at the cost of a few dollars a month, then don’t even think twice.   

Here is why you need to take that extra step and not rely on generic information and free YouTube videos: EVERYONE HAS ACCESS TO THEM!  

If everyone can grab hold of something, then remember that it’s basic. You need to take it up a notch to be able to overtake your coworkers and move forward. And the way to do that is by allowing yourself to learn and implement more.  

So take a chance on yourself and make some real progress. Invest your own time and money in yourself and you’ll definitely start seeing a difference. It isn’t easy with everyone competing for the same thing, but the secret is to know which area you need to work on and allocate the time and effort to make it happen!

Do you want to learn how to accelerate your development and progress in life? Investing in yourself is extremely important and we can help you to find a way. Check out the microlearning section on our site.  

Also, here are 3 Methods successful women follow to keep their career on track 

Photo by Jungwoo Hong on Unsplash

What to Do When You Are Distracted from Your Goal

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Distractions … sweet distractions. You cost us so much. Even if we don’t realise it instantly. An average person looks at the phone 52 times a day according to a study.  On the other hand, progress with work and with a career is not only a natural desire or a basic need, it is also important from a mental health perspective.

 

Let’s see how we end up sabotaging ourselves.

Assuming we spend about 15 seconds on the phone each time (as a distraction), which may not be the case, such a distraction costs us at least 13 minutes a day. Let’s count the time we need to put ourselves back in working mode and we can quickly see how pricey it is to allow distractions into our life. Longer interruptions require even longer time to recover.

During the time you saved avoiding short interruptions, you could have another break which you could spend taking a walk in the park close by or having a coffee with a friend. You could painlessly integrate the daily workout in your schedule or read from/listen to your favourite book. I know, some would use it to do more work. Which is perfectly OK, too.

 

So, the solution is easy-peasy. Don’t look at your phone, don’t allow anything or anyone to distract you.

Here are a few techniques to prevent distraction.

  • Plan your day in the morning and include the breaks. With the breaks integrated in your schedule, you give yourself the opportunity to relax and be distracted when you need not be productive.
  • Listen to your mind and body and plan your time in shorter segments. Work in thirty- or forty-minutes segments and take a short break after each segment. With time, you will work for an hour and then even for longer periods.
  • Let your boss, colleagues, friends and family know when you need time to work without interruption and make sure you are clear on how much quiet time you have.
  • Leave your phone in another room, unless you need the phone for your work.

Working without interruption would be ideal, although we rarely have the opportunity to experience such a bliss and most of us don’t work in a Tibetan temple.

What to do when you are already distracted?

  • Let the source of the interruption (if it is a person) know how much time you have for them.
  • Train your mind to keep a line of thought to help you get back to your work faster.
  • Make a quick note of where you were before the interruption and then deal with the distraction.
  • Work on a different task which requires a shorter time to tune into.
  • Find links between topics. If you find yourself distracted by another topic, consider continuing with the new topic.
  • If the background noise interrupts you time to time, find a white noise that works for you, or a quiet place.
  • Learn to meditate, it helps develop focus.

As you can see, there are simple techniques you can adopt to reduce interruptions in your life. Though, if you distract yourself, think about why you are doing it.

  • Is it a specific time of the day when you distract yourself?
  • Is there a specific topic or question you want to avoid?
  • Or, is it a form of procrastination?

You might be interested in the following article where we talk about how you can use relaxation and visualisation to help advance your career.

 

Photo by Charlz Gutiérrez De Piñeres on Unsplash

Tips How to Track Your Goals

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Tips How to Track Your Goals

Why isn’t the title say: Tips How to Track Your Progress? Because making progress doesn’t necessarily mean you are going in the right direction.

We all make progress in our lives and knowing what progress we make definitely helps. Although without knowing how such progress adds to the success, the progress is no more than a step forward. We don’t know how big the step is or if we, in fact, walk on the yellow brick road.

But by tracking your progress, you do more than most people do. The question is whether it is enough to achieve high performance and the level of success you are happy with. And there is another question. If tracking your progress itself is not sufficient, then what is?

 

Tracking a goal, assuming the tracking method is fit-for-purpose, will give you sufficient information on both your progress and the added value of your efforts to your success.

 

But what method can you use to track your goals?

You are not tracking the goal itself; you are tracking your progress toward the goal, you are tracking how close you are achieving the goal in time and quality. That makes sense, doesn’t it?

Naturally, you can choose methods to track your progress against a goal if you sufficiently specified the goal. Which means your goal needs to be specific enough for you to be able to measure your progress against it. What then means, your goal has to include specific details about it. E.g., a deadline, or a certain % of the progress you would like to achieve.

E.g. My goal could be: ‘I would like to read two books every month this year.’

  • The goal in this example specifies what I would like to achieve and in what time frame. What I would like to achieve is to learn from two books and I do that in a month.
  • It also tells me how I will achieve it. I achieve the learning by reading.
  • Moreover, it tells me that unless I read two books (100% of the book) a month, I am going to stay behind my goal.

You can define for yourself the progress you have to make each month, or a week, or even a day to achieve your goal. In the example before I did just that.
And sometimes achieving such progress is not going to be linear; or you have to do different things each time to get where you want to be.

 

All in all, if you have a long-term goal, breaking it down to smaller pieces will help you better understand how you meet it and will reduce the risk of not achieving it, too.
Additionally, it will also help you revise your strategy, if needed, along the way.

 

But some people say that setting goals is meaningless anyway, so why do I bother tracking them?

This is a question I received many times this year. I realised there were articles out there with titles suggesting goal setting had no added value, even though the articles mostly included the benefits of goal-setting in various ways. So, here is my answer.

  • Setting goals just for the sake of it is meaningless.
  • Setting a goal that does not resonate with your life strategy and plan, doesn’t matter how SMART your goal is, is also meaningless.
  • Without setting goals though, even if you have a clear view of your life strategy or your priorities for the next three to five years, you will struggle.

Because goals are basically milestones. At least they should be. They are the lights at both sides of the path you walk on in the park. And I am not suggesting life is a walk in the park. I am suggesting life is a journey.

Imagine you are travelling by ship. A beautiful large ship with all the facilities and programmes to make your journey exciting and joyful.

  • How would this ship make a long and successful journey without knowing where the harbours are and where it needs to stop for supplies?
  • What is the way to enjoy the journey without knowing you are safe, and the staff knows exactly what to do and when to make your journey pleasant?
  • How would the staff know what to do and when without planning?
  • And how would the staff be able to plan without goals?

But tracking your progress against a goal is not just about knowing what you want to achieve. The goal or in that case the milestone is an outcome; and what takes you to the result is action. During your journey, you want to know what you need to do to get the desired result.
Once you know what you want to do, your goal essentially

  • you need to know how success looks like, and
  • how you can measure the success, and
  • what is the shortest time period which is reasonable to measure for progress.

And that answers an important question. Should you track your progress daily, or weekly or monthly, maybe quarterly? It all depends on your goals and on your discipline.

 

And what tools can you use to measure your progress?

This is an interesting question, because there are many good tools out there.

Nowadays there is an app for everything.

  • If you want a few clicks and nothing more a day because you are extremely busy, you can do that.
  • If you trust detailed information, you can use a spreadsheet or a project or task management app.
  • You are not good with written words, just use a voice recorder or a transcriber app.

I suggest you don’t waste time on finding the perfect tracking tool first. Find one that is good enough and perfect your tracking method. Once you are satisfied with the way how you track your goals and performance, you will find the perfect tracking tool, too.

If there are useful tools that you can utilize why some people never reach their goals? You can find the answer in the article we published Why don’t people reach their goals?

Beat the 4 factors which make many professionals leave their jobs

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decision-makin techniques article cover image

If you are working in an office environment, you will most likely agree that building a career is not just about expertise in your professional field. Personal and social skills increasingly weigh in.

We are working in teams and maintain sometimes virtual relationships with others across the pond. Additionally, various leadership styles influence the company culture differently.

We can all read about which leadership behaviours team members are looking for. When we building a career  all we want is 

– to be valued,

– have the opportunity to grow, and

– and to keep a healthy work-life balance.

According to a study involving 30 countries, the leadership practices of an effective leader include:

– Providing guidance and defining objectives

– Communicating the expectations often and with clarity

– Listening to ideas and new approaches

– Openness to change their minds

– Helping team members to grow

These leadership practices influence the areas, where leaders can fall short according to studies, including one summarised in the Harvard Business Review years ago. Such as not

– giving clear direction;

– securing time to meet employees;

– recognising progress and achievements, and taking credit for others’ work;

– offering constructive feedback or criticism.

Even though the study was concluded years ago, the progress has not much been visible in the recent years.

But how is this all related to building a career? Great question.

For one, you may also be a leader, perhaps in the near future.

The reason I decided to highlight these factors is that most of us start as team members and we develop our professional skills, meet the expectations of our leaders and do our work in the environment shaped by the leaders, too.

Being on the other end of

– the lacking attention, or

– favouritism,

– slogan culture, or

– lack of follow through on commitments or promises is not a pleasant place to be. Also, it won’t help building a career in any industry.

However, understanding the potential reasons for such behaviours can help you help your leader and yourself to move your career forward. Knowing the reasons, you will be able to decide on and implement a corresponding action.

Lack of attention and listening

How lack of attention can block building a career?

– The boss doesn’t talk to you often, or not at all. Yes, it is true, there are managers out there who prefer emailing or instant messaging to their team members instead of talking to them, even on the phone.

– Your line manager sparingly shares information relevant to your work with you.

– The line manager does not listen to your opinion.

– You receive new tasks one after another, but there is no recognition of the results.

Potential reasons your boss acts like this.

– Your boss does not understand what information you need to know.

– The line manager struggles to handle the complexity or the office politics around them, become overwhelmed and spend most of their energy to keep afloat.

– They feel more secure making the decisions themselves.

What you can do

You cannot change the political games or the complexity when you are building a career, but can reduce it at your level. If your boss needs support and you have the information and insight, your boss is going to listen. All you have to do is to make it relatable for your manager.

Many line managers choose to avoid risks. That includes giving a chance to their team members in high visibility projects. Naturally, ambitious professionals are hungry for such projects.

Get involved in smaller projects and prove yourself in the field, show your capabilities gradually to your boss.

Favouritism

How do you know your boss has favourites?

– One or some of the colleagues at work are subject to little or no scrutiny for their low or lower performance.

– Your boss does not comment on the lack of adherence to the dress code, or if one team member is late from work repeatedly, while others receive feedback.

– The best projects go to the same person or people again and again.

– There is an open-door policy for some.

– Professional development or participation in networking events are exclusive to some.

Potential reasons for favouritism

– There is a well-oiled machine already in place, a smaller group of team members have been working in the company for long together, the boss has not adapted to the new situation and did not figure out how to involve the new ones yet.

– Or there is a friendship or family ties between the boss and the “favourite”.

– Company culture allows it.

What you can do

In case you work in a culture which tolerates, or even encourages favouritism, the best is to decide whether you want to accept it or you look for another job.

If you join a team where members formed close relationships, there is a chance for you to integrate. Such a team proved the members can relate to each other. Once you learn the rules of the team, you can choose how to align to those informal rules and with time you are going influence the rules, too.

Family ties are different and even though sometimes family members might agree with each other to show care and keep the peace, no business owner works against their business and no manager prefers solutions that do not help them achieve their goals, so you have a good chance to convince them about your ideas and work toward the position you aim for.

Favouritism is one of the frequent reasons talented professionals leave teams and companies.

But the situation is not hopeless. If you decided to join a company, you most likely did not plan for two months and wanted to add and get value out of your time there.

– Concentrate on your performance and development. Do not let favouritism have a negative impact on you. Behave normally.

– Communicate both your results and your ambitions to your boss. Define what you want to achieve, so it becomes clear to both you and your boss what you are aiming for and working toward. This way it will all be measurable, and commitments will also be clear from the beginning.

– Build relationships. Leave your bitterness out of the equation because results will serve you, if not in that specific team, in another. Every effort you make is for your own good and professional progress. Read more about why supportive relationships are enablers to a more successful life.

Working in a slogan culture

What is a slogan culture?

Managers are using slogans in their communications more often than you would think.

To ensure people align with the business strategy, organisations introduce phrases to represent core messages. Such phrases can become slogans.

Add to this the slogans coming from the management literature and you will understand how difficult it is for professionals to avoid speaking in slogans.

Slogan culture is a step beyond repeating messages that flow top-down in the company. It means the organisation tolerates people repeating popular buzzwords and the lack of performance or low performance. Living on slogans has another impact. As a new idea comes along, another slogan becomes popular. The organisation can end up changing projects regularly and confusing people.

Potential reasons behind a company supporting buzzwords and failing to concentrate on results

Initially, I must tell you that no business can survive on buzzwords.

Perhaps, particular teams or leaders tolerate one or more individuals to keep afloat parroting for a while, however such a behaviour has an expiry date. Falling numbers surface rapidly.

Slogan culture can find roots in a team because of leadership behaviours. As a root cause, there is potentially a disconnect between the company strategy and execution, or the company is not clear on the direction, or its place on the market.

What you can do

– Find the core message behind the buzzwords and act according to the spirit of the messages. There will be mentors who look for the performance.

– Be yourself and think about your long-term goals. You are not a leaf flying in either direction depending on the wind. Flexibility is important because there will be changing priorities. But a business’s direction does not change monthly. Look for the patterns.

– Buzzwords have a place in communications but not in the world of actions. Action means, there is a tangible outcome. Go for achieving results and making an impact.

– Remember, if your gut tells that you are a misfit, you are one for sure. Think about alternatives.

Failing to follow through

Lack of proof of performance

That becomes most visible. Lack of results or the outcome coming together slowly. You can also recognise there are many projects running parallel without even one showing results.

Team members talk a lot about such projects, one meeting follows another but there is no output. There is no measurement of the progress or definition of quality and expectations.

People do not feel inspired even though the atmosphere is pleasant.

You want to proceed but there is always another hoop to jump through. Decision making is slow. Even though slow decision making is not a direct cause of the lack of follow through, it can suggest people in the organisation struggle to take risks and responsibility. In such an environment, delayed tracking of progress appears more often.

Potential causes of not following through

– Lack of direction from the leadership and lack of attention to running the business overall.

– The business is performing really well because it has a superb product or service offering and operational problems are not efficiently handled because the focus is on sales.

– They do not motivate your line manager or the supervisory layer of the organisation to drive performance.

– Your manager, potentially most of the leaders are so overloaded with work, they cannot simply follow up on everything.

What you can do

– Concentrate on your performance, your deadlines, and your delivery. You work for your own progress and not to please your boss.

– If your boss is not motivated, find out how you can help them find that mojo again. Of course, it is not your responsibility to motivate your line manager, but helping them will help you, too. Also, think about your motivation, so you can avoid burnout.

– Find other mentors in the organisation and align yourself with high performers.

From the above you see, there is no limit to your progress when you building a career. Once you are clear on the problem, you can decide on the action and will find a solution. Show tenacity and you will succeed.

Click to read more about how women keep their career on track.

3 Methods successful women follow to keep their career on track

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methods successful women follow

We bring many habits and beliefs from our childhood, but it would be a mistake to believe that only those beliefs influence us, even at later stages in our lives. There are good practices we can learn from successful women who already made it.

 

 

Also worth to check these 9 Ways to improve your self-discipline.

Some grow up in a family where setting goals is a natural part of kids’ lives from their early age, while other parents let their kids discover the way of planning their life and tasks on their own. One method may work as good as the other.

We bring many habits and beliefs from our childhood, but it would be a mistake to believe that only those beliefs influence us, even at later stages in our lives. There are good practices we can learn from women who already made it.
Let’s see a couple of examples:

Plan your life as you would plan a project in your work.

When you are working on a project in your job, you need to plan resources, assess risks, consider limitations and make sure the project is going to deliver the benefits you or your stakeholders expect.

  • Why would you accept anything less?
  • Why would you care any less when it comes to your life?

If you think about your career as a journey from the “Where have you been” through the “Where you are at the moment” on your way to the “Where you should be”, you are going to focus on what positions, tasks, experiences and skills take you there. And that is precisely the focus you need.

Fear not to say no

Over your lifetime many opportunities will come your way. Some will look particularly great, while others you need to let go.

You heard the word “no” many times in your life but when it comes to saying it to someone else, especially to a person who may be able to influence how your career develops, saying no might not be the most natural thing to do. We are all inclined to say yes now and then; when we should say no.

Think about it that way, every time you say yes when you should say no, you take time and opportunity away from yourself. Every time you say no you create space for something that works for you better.

Work with mentors

Setting goals is easy when you have a clear idea of what you want and a sense of purpose, but it becomes slightly fuzzy when you are not sure what direction to take. If you are in this situation right now, just know that you are not alone. Many people, at some point in their lives, will reach a turning point when they realise they have to change their ways.

Our parents or grandparents had probably worked for the same company for decades, while changes these days are constant in the majority of business sectors; and professionals need to adopt new practices more often than not. Whenever a change, affecting your career progress happens, it also creates an opportunity to think about your life overall.

In the middle of changes and the daily grind, your ability to see the bigger picture is different, and it is advised that you find a mentor who either had a similar situation in her or his life or has already achieved what you want to accomplish.

Ways how self-awareness helps your career progress

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how self-awareness can help your career article cover image

Why you are the best person to improve self-awareness

Some believe that self-awareness is the most important skill when it comes to building a successful professional career. On the other hands others may tell you that self-awareness is somewhat superficial, and you need to have a solid education and professional skills to make it in the world of work.

Even though there is an increasing number of articles and sources that provide you with information about self-awareness, it still might be slightly challenging to grasp the true meaning of it.

Finding a definition is quite easy but to understand how self-awareness works and more importantly how it helps your career progress may be a challenge.

Why is it a challenge?

I believe it is because understanding any concept is only the first step. Applying the knowledge and integrating habits that help self-growth can then follow.

First, let’s see what self-awareness is.

According to the Oxford Dictionaries, it is a “Conscious knowledge of one’s own character, feelings, motives, and desires.”

After reading this definition, it is easier to understand how self-awareness affects career and career progress. Think about the time when you started your career and be very honest.

  • How much was your first job a conscious choice?
  • How much did you consider your strengths and weaknesses when you sent out your job applications for the first time?

Majority of young people try to grab a job opportunity as soon as they can to start their career. So, don’t feel bad if you were not super conscious about your career choices back then.

I think I am right to assume though that, with time, your choices have been more about taking advantage of your skills and talent. As you matured, you focused on building a career that gave you the opportunity to expand either vertically or horizontally. Whenever you switched jobs, you were looking for something else, a new challenge.

You listened to your motives and desires and shaped your job search accordingly.

While this was undoubtedly your self-awareness in motion, you may ask yourself a question whether there were or there are other areas where your self-awareness could give you a competitive edge. And the answer to this question is a definite yes.

Regardless of the industry you are working in, or your professional field, no work can be done alone without the support of and contribution from others. To get that, you need to have social skills and the foundation of all success in any social environment is self-awareness.

Let’s just see a couple of examples, think about your work environment and job.

  • What makes you feel stressed?
  • What leaves you feeling depleted?
  • How do you respond to authority?
  • With what type of leadership style do you work best together?
  • How do you deal with criticism?
  • What is your number one conflict resolution tactic?

This isn’t me, but what is me then?

From the above questions you can see that without being self-aware you are not able to answer such question. Furthermore, without being self-aware, your choices around which company or team to join may leave you with disappointment.

Just by answering these questions, you will have a clear picture of what environment you would like to work in. In addition, you will see what type of work gives you inspiration and satisfaction. No one else can make these choices for you and although getting paid is great but getting paid for a job you don’t enjoy may be miserable. Check these techniques to help advance your career.

So, even if you think self-awareness is not the most important thing when building your career, I am sure you agree that it has such a high impact that you cannot ignore developing it.

Cover photo by Laura Dewilde on Unsplash

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Is a glass-half-full way of thinking hardwired in us?

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Have you ever wondered if you are a glass-half-full or glass-half-empty type of person? Do you find positivity in things, or do you find yourself regularly worrying about what may go wrong? Read about the benefits of a positive attitude, examples of fake positivity, and how your mindset can determine outcomes.

Your mind is powerful, you see. What you fear may, in fact, come true. The good news is that what you desire can become your reality if you know how to master your mind.  

I read an article a couple of years ago about research findings of biological evidence to prove there are negative and positive people worldwide. It sounded interesting.  At least I found it interesting because I have always believed that I have a choice, even in following a positive or a negative mindset. Learn how the glass-half-full way of thinking can help you. 

A study was performed at Michigan State University, involving 71 women. It is not an extensive research study, I admit. However, it did inspire me to think about how a positive mindset can help us unleash our potential. And as you know, I am a big fan of discovering, expressing, and unleashing the talent and resources we hid in ourselves.

Some survey participants struggled to put a positive spin on difficult situations that they had to observe. The study participants looked at various photos and provided their opinion about the potential outcome of a situation they saw in the picture. 

I found the results interesting and like to think that I have a choice. Even though some people might find it more difficult to view certain situations in a favorable light, adopting a positive attitude is possible.  

Let me give you an example.  

No matter if you are an employee or a business owner, during the COVID19 pandemic, most of us experienced a certain level of uncertainty due to the decreased level of business activity. The restrictions brought on by the virus outbreak negatively affected many employers and businesses.  

On the other hand, this slower pace of business may provide the perfect opportunity to develop ourselves and think through if we are in the right place at a good time. We may use it to determine which areas we want to develop and what we can do to prepare for being hit even harder or rapidly adapt to the accelerating phase.  
Having reviewed our skills and knowledge, we can determine what skills we need to acquire to be able to keep up with the changing demand.  

It’s not all merry

Of course, I am not saying we should convince ourselves that whatever happens in our lives is positive and beneficial to us. Especially if we get into a situation when it‘s tough to see the end of the tunnel, others suggesting a positive meaning to an otherwise negative or neutral event or circumstance can, in fact, result in a controversial interpretation.  

For example, during the lockdown, suggesting that Saturday night is going to be super-fun may make us realize what we may miss out on… 

But I give you another example. COVID19 forced us to think differently about business, and many companies found themselves accommodating for remote work. That resulted in decisions such as reducing home–office employees‘ (people who work from home) salaries. We all know that changes to compensation negatively impact motivation and work efficiency. Telling employees can work from home will not cheer them up when you reduce their pay, as working from home comes with its own challenges. Challenges not many were or are ready to tackle just yet.  

Getting back to the positive thinking topic. I believe that being a glass-half-full person is, in fact, rewarding. Let me share with you a couple of reasons why the glass-half-full way of thinking is helpful. 

#1: Expecting a positive outcome and good things to come will lead you to take action 

Taking action or a series of steps results in progress, and more often than not, in positive outcomes unless your positivity is somewhat a naivety or irresponsible behavior.  

Let me share Lizzy‘s story. Lizzy had a performance conversation with her boss about the potential to participate in an overseas project within a year as a developmental opportunity. Lizzy was quite excited and quickly deep-dived into learning the French language. Lizzy was excited about the opportunity so much that she wanted to prove to herself and the line manager she did her best to prepare for the upcoming project. 

Would Lizzy had been less optimistic and trusting, she could have just laid back and waited to find out whether the opportunity was to come or not. Because she started to learn the language and build connections with her French colleagues, it was easier for her to be part of the project team. By the time the project team member selection came, she was supported not only by her line manager but also by the French project manager. 

#2: Expecting negative results or bad things to come your way will slow you down 

Or, even worse will keep you from taking action, and you will deny yourself of the steps that might have helped you prevent or reduce the adverse outcome you feared. This is what you may also call a self-fulfilling prophecy.  

I give you an example from my personal circle of friends and acquaintances. Years ago, a talented architect was thinking about starting his own construction company and envisaged to starts small, mainly with refurbishments. Even though he had the knowledge, the skills, the experience, and connections, he didn’t believe he could be successful in his own business and sell such services. No one could convince him otherwise. 

That thought, that belief, basically paralyzed him and held him back from starting the business overall. Until this day, he hasn’t started this business and still works as an architect for a company.  

#3: With a positive mindset, you find more opportunities! 

Does it mean there are more opportunities for the optimists? Not at all. I often say here a pessimist sees a problem, I find an opportunity.  

Have you seen anyone solving a problem by complaining about it? I haven‘t. Just to link back to the previous example, finding a business partner with strengths in selling the construction services would have been an excellent kick-start for this architect on his entrepreneur journey.  

#4: Expecting positive things to happen is also helpful in closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be 

Even if you struggle to see the way forward or where your desired destination is, with a positive mindset, you take the courage to step outside your comfort zone and do something you found challenging before. It is undeniably an excellent way to stretch yourself because it builds self-confidence in a specific field and improves your overall self-esteem.  

Problem-solving is a creative process, so a positive attitude is essential 

How would you even start solving a problem if you do not believe you can end up with a solution.  

Yes, problem-solving requires us to think about the problem itself. It also includes an analysis of the problem, which then leads to solution options through multiple steps. 

Some would argue that willingness to solve a particular problem also depends on the level of dissatisfaction and discomfort with the situation we are trying to solve, and I somewhat agree with that opinion.  

Let‘s look at a situation that happens quite often in corporate companies. These organizations have structured but sometimes more rigid policies and processes than small businesses. This includes the need to use systems that align with well laid-out internal processes.  
Such systems are built without giving much flexibility to users, which benefits the business and can make the users’ lives somewhat miserable. As long as the user can work with a system without extensive additional work, they will not take active steps to find workarounds. Once their dissatisfaction reaches a certain level, they will, for sure, find a way to avoid using the system.  

Many companies use SAP or ORACLE as their enterprise resource planning system. Both systems require discipline and following the internal rules of how to operate these solutions. Once users are requested to provide ad hoc reports, they might not find a way to satisfy the demand using these solutions. Until the additional work needed to meet the ad hoc demands does not reach an intolerable amount, the users will not complain about the solution itself.  

In another example, thinking about business owners who use email marketing on a daily basis, an email marketing tool can support their needs up to a level. As long as they can perform most of the impactful tasks with the tool, they will not think about changing or replacing it.  

Reframing a situation is a double-edged sword, depending on what mindset you adopt 

Beyond the willingness, reframing the situation and viewing it from a different angle is also important from a problem-solving point of view.  

Let‘s see a way to get to a solution for our architect, whose example I shared before. Remember? He didn‘t believe he could sell his services, and therefore he hasn‘t even started his business. That said, we can hypothetically create a trigger thought, which is ‘I don‘t believe I can successfully sell my services.’ Reframing requires a shift from the passive zone.  

We more extensively talk about the characteristics of the passive zone in the Kickstarter Program™, which is a 4-week online course aimed at female professionals who work in corporate environments to help them accelerate their career progression. If you are interested to learn more about the program, just visit our website (unleashr-mentoring.com) or send us an email at questions@unleashr.co.uk. 

We designed, made available, and affordable The Kickstarter Program™ to most professionals working at even the lower levels of their organization because I believe the knowledge that moves you forward in most cases is not that far. Still, direction and guidance are crucial in finding the most impactful ways to move a career forward without exhausting yourself in the process. The Kickstarter Program™ is focused on those aspects of repeated success that enable you to accelerate your career growth. 

Reframing in action

So, getting back to reframing and the passive zone. The first step of reframing is to create an action to define a first step, however small it is, to move you out of the passive state that you may be in.  
Appropriate questions for the architect in the example, therefore, could be  

  • ‘What should I do to be able to sell my services?‘  
  • ‘What do I need to do to sell my services if I have the expertise, skills, and connections to provide satisfying results for my client?.‘ 
  • ‘What am I missing?‘ 

In other words, what is the first step that I can take to make myself or my business to be able to sell?  

If you change the way you look at your situation and the challenges in it, not only your view will change but your ability to solve the problem as well. Your mind will suddenly shed light on a rich array of opportunities to discover inner resources and the ways to grow.  

Cover photo by Mateus Campos Felipe on Unsplash

9 Ways to improve your self-discipline

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When successful people talk about the secrets of their progress in life they highlight the importance of self-discipline. Whether it is a success they achieved in their professional lives or in their personal lives, maybe both, their inherent ability for self-control through discipline was one of the key levers of their success.

They have been able to keep their thoughts, emotions and behaviours in check, which paired with an optimistic view and positive affirmations can be very powerful tools to achieve continuous development. Staying focused may be difficult sometimes, there will be better days, and on other days you may find it trying to go on. A good way to stay motivated is by using a personal reward system to make you want to stay disciplined. Some people find it helpful to have a friend that motivates them and keeps them on track. Meditation can help to clear your head at the beginning of your day. You also want to set yourself up with a schedule that will help you stay organized. Sometimes it is difficult to maintain your self-discipline. Here are some ideas to help you improve it.

Improving your self-discipline is vital to achieving any goal. Without it, it is difficult to avoid temptation. The essentials of discipline are routine and dedication. The following tips are to help you improve your self-discipline.

Maintaining a routine.

Most of what we do day by day is habit driven, it is not difficult to create a routine so you can stay focussed and have the discipline to accomplish your goal. You can put yourself on a daily routine by getting a planner and creating a daily schedule for yourself. When you know day to day what you need to do to accomplish your goal, it makes it easier to achieve it and it becomes more obtainable. You will want to keep your appointments in this planner so you know exactly where you need to be at any given point during the day, this makes it all so easy to see at a glance what will be coming up next, so you can prepare yourself mentally for the challenges you will be facing. It works for me when I allow at least 15 minutes break between meetings whenever I can, because even this short time provides me with the opportunity to gather my thoughts, collect questions, think about what I want out of that specific meeting and make a quick plan. Find 3 Methods that successful women follow to keep their career on track.

Being dedicated to achieving your goals.

Make sure you are dedicated to the goal you are trying to achieve or you will not succeed. Goals are difficult to accomplish if you aren’t serious about them. Dedication prevents backsliding and helps you to move forward and succeed at your goals. Also, gives you the focus that helps improve your self-discipline.

Setting different levels of goals will also assist you in reaching your end goal. Set not more than four long-term goals and break them down into short term ones. As you meet each short-term goal it will help keep you motivated to move forward and you will find yourself on a path of achieving and passing milestones leading to the achievement of your long-term goal. This way the short-term goals will become stepping stones to achieve the higher goal you set for yourself.

Use Positive affirmations.

Positive affirmations strengthen self-control by helping you focus on the optimistic side of a situation instead of the negative. That helps to prevent immediate impulses and unnecessary stressors. Every day you can start out by telling yourself that you are strong, confident and capable. These steps will boost your confidence and improve your self-discipline. It may sound a bit silly first, but after a couple of days you will experience that you will in fact feel more capable and confident. 

Start everyday visualizing how you want that day to go.

You want to visualise the long-term rewards that come from success. Also, you can visualise your end goal, and how exactly you plan to get to that end goal. Visualisation helps you organize your thoughts and see the big picture. You can use visualisation to come up with a strategy to meet your goals. 5 Ways you can use relaxation and visualisation to help advance your career.

Give yourself a little reward after doing a good job.

Positive reinforcement is a great way to motivate anyone to get things done. Try to motivate yourself with small rewards for achieving your goals. The small rewards along the way will help keep things positive and make you want to keep going instead of giving up when it gets difficult.

Feel gratitude.

Being grateful for what we already have is something we may forget doing in the midst of the busy weekdays. Some of us concentrate on what we haven’t achieved yet, which is unhelpful to say the least when it comes to keep up motivation levels. Spending time thinking about what you don’t have may lead to action once the dissatisfaction reached a certain level and the situation becomes unbearable, otherwise it will be another way to feel sorry for yourself.

Don’t let mistakes cause you to quit.

Everyone makes mistakes. While climbing that mountain of success you are bound to slip up from time to time. What you need to keep in mind is just to keep moving forward don’t let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game. If you allow your mistakes to discourage you and make you quit then you will never achieve your goals. Keep in mind that Einstein failed thousands of times while working on his theories and that didn’t stop him from becoming a famous scientist. Thomas Edison destroyed his house while inventing the lightbulb.  As you can see mistakes can actually lead you in the right direction.

Acknowledge your weaknesses.

Most of us like to focus only on our positive attributes. This is a great thing to do most of the time, but in order to become a stronger individual it is also important to acknowledge your weaknesses so you can work to strengthen them. Most people ignore their weaknesses or they minimize the negative impact that these can have on their lives. If you admit your weaknesses, you can do things to help reinforce your areas of weakness so you can improve on them and become a stronger person.

Conclusion.

In conclusion self-discipline plays an important role in success. To achieve your goals, you must have a stable sense of self-discipline. Self-discipline requires a lot of structure and planning. Keeping a steady routine is the easiest way to maintain self-discipline. You must not forget; however, to stay dedicated to your goals and follow through with them. Make positive affirmations daily and visualize how you want your day to go.  Have good friends around you to keep you motivated and don’t forget to reward yourself when you are successful! Remember to meditate every day to clear your mind. Above all, learn from your mistakes and accept your weaknesses. With these simple steps, you can improve your self-discipline that help you achieve your goals, reach your dreams and make a happier and less chaotic life even if you have to face multi tasking.

Photo by Etty Fidele on Unsplash