10 Signs of Low Self-Confidence

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When you experience the signs of low self-confidence, you are not fulfilling your true potential. Read on to become familiar with these signs. That is the first step to improving your self-confidence and enabling your personal growth.

We all have manifested signs of low self-confidence at various points in our lives. Have you ever wondered what self-confidence truly means? I am sure you have already heard various definitions because it can be explained in multiple ways.  

Self-confidence means trusting in your abilities and talent. You have the belief that no matter what happens, you will be able to achieve your goal or solve a problem regardless of how difficult it may seem. You know you can succeed in any situation as you have the knowledge, resources, and abilities. 

Self-confidence also means that we feel safe when we are doing our day to day tasks as we know how to execute them. However, if a new situation or problem arises, we panic or might get scared. Being able to fight this feeling and get on top of it is also defined as self-confidence.

Everyone has self-confidence. Some more, some less. Some in a particular area, while others in different fields. Self-confidence is linked to various areas of life.

What does higher self-confidence contribute to?

  • Developing the ability to establish and maintain happier relationships.
  • Earning more money.
  • Building more satisfying careers.
  • Generally, to a more successful life.

To start your journey to a more satisfying and successful life, you have to be honest with yourself and realize whether there is work to be done with your confidence level.

 

10 Signs of Low Self-Confidence

Think about the past two weeks. Do you recognize any of these in your behaviors?

  1. You are hesitant or unable to accept compliments. Instead of saying a simple ‘Thank you’ – as you very likely worked hard for that compliment and are deserving of it – you will say something like ‘Oh, it is nothing, anybody could have done it’ and downplay it.
  2. You worry about what other people think. Besides, you cannot be yourself as you always walk on eggshells and try to please everybody around you. Confident people do acknowledge what others might think about them. But they care about it on a healthy level, as they have accepted, and love themselves, as they are. They consider others’ opinions when they need it, and they constructively engage their inputs.
  3. You do not trust yourself and your judgment.
    Another sign of low self-confidence is that you continuously ask for others’ opinion and judgment as a support to ensure your decision is the right one. Also, you might struggle to make sound decisions as you think others know better than you. Although, let’s not forget that at times, we all lose trust in our judgment. Self-confidence is about reaching back to past success and capabilities.
  4. You make excuses or blame others. Instead of owning up to your mistakes, you blame others or make excuses. Accepting the fact that you have made a mistake might feel like a weakness to you.
  5. Take constructive feedback as criticism. Due to not having a clear picture of their strengths, individuals with low self-confidence will take any negative feedback personally. This behavior makes them feel demotivated and even more unsure about their abilities.
  6. You do not like being in charge.
    People with a lack of self-confidence are afraid of being in a leading position as they cannot make choices without the approval of others.
  7. Accepting or giving in to blame. You often feel that you need to accept the responsibility for whatever went wrong and that it happened because of you. If you have low self-confidence, it is just easier to give in and take the blame than to stand up for yourself. 
  8. Comparing yourself with others. Instead of concentrating on yourself and how you can succeed, you are always checking what and how other people do and achieve. Comparing ourselves to others is not a problem as long as we can see it as an opportunity, and we find a better way forward without feeling like a loser in the competition. On some level, we all compare ourselves to others.
  9. You back down in an argument just to please others. You would rather keep your opinion to yourself, even if you know you are right, just to avoid conflict and keep up the peace.
  10. Giving up too soon. You might try something new but give it up before giving it your best shot as you think ‘it will never work for me’.

If, after reading these behaviors, you may have just realized that you might be lacking self-confidence. You need to know that many different factors contribute to low self-confidence: bad experiences, cultural background, etc. You also need to know that it is not your fault, and you can build your self-confidence back up. Although your past cannot be changed, there is help out there to guide you through the process.

It is so important to understand that if you are ready to put some time and work into it, with the right help and tools, you will be able to shine and enjoy a happier, more successful life and career.

You might like the What does it take to be confident? article that we published on this topic.

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3 Things That Might Hold You Back

3 things that might hold you back

3-min read

Looking at successful people around you may make you wonder whether you are on the right track. However if you spend too much time pondering over your past failures it may paralyse you. Find out three ways how you can increase your self-confidence.

Find ways how to avoid things that hold you back

Making a couple of good moves may be easy but repeating success poses a series of whole new challenges. Looking at all those successful people around you may make you wonder whether you are on the right track.

Such thoughts are beneficial when it comes to checking on your progress and the overall direction of your life, but if you spend too much time pondering over your past failures or actions you label as failures, you might find yourself in the passive zone.

The passive zone is a period in your life, which might last hours or days, even weeks or months, and during that time you slow down; or even worse the fear that you cannot meet the expectations will paralyse you. 

What are these things that hold you back?

You probably failed in the past in a particular field, or someone told you that you failed.

When it comes to failure, it is better to step back a little and think about what failure means to you. Some see failure as a dreadful thing and associate the lack of success with it; and while this is partly right, failure itself can be rewarding, too.
What is this crazy article talking about, right?

Situations in which we don’t entirely achieve what we set out for ourselves are often excellent learning opportunities. If you take the time thinking about your situation and what exactly happened, you will undoubtedly find things that worked well and some that didn’t.

Let’s see an example:

You attend the job interview and you don’t get the role. In black and white, it is a failure. You needed a job, you had the chance to present your fitness for the position, and you didn’t get the role. Straightforward failure. Or is it?

Think about the whole process:

  • Did you update your CV and did you include the relevant skills and experiences?
  • How did you prepare for the interview?
  • Did you do your research about the company?
  • Can you remember the great and the less pleasant moments of the conversation?
    If so, you can pinpoint when it didn’t work out so well.

People around you are telling you that you are not capable of accomplishing what you set out for yourself.

That is an interesting one because for that they must be in your shoes and they must live your life. Do they now?

Furthermore, they have to know you better than you know yourself. While there are people who have very little self-awareness, I don’t assume you are one. In fact, there is a tiny to zero chance that you are one. Do you know why? Because you are reading this article.

So why do these people tell you that you are not capable?

  • They might not have a good view of your situation.
  • They don’t know you very well yet.
  • They wouldn’t be able to successfully deliver in a similar situation and assume you wouldn’t be able to do that either.
  • They are worried about you because they think your goal is a considerable undertaking.
  • They underestimate you.
  • They are jealous.

These are just a couple of examples, but I am sure you get the picture. People around you may have several reasons to tell one thing or another, and it is up to you whether you let their opinion influence you and these things that hold you back. Find out here How do people drag you down? 

Your Fears

You don’t take on a new responsibility at your job because you fear you won’t meet the expectations. Question is whether you really know what the expectations are, or you assume what the expectations would be.

You would be surprised just how many times people assume certain things. They look at someone’s face or try to interpret their gestures; they don’t ask for performance indicators or success factors.

Take time and figure out where your fear is coming from, understand the aspects of your concern. Get to know your fear before you decide facing it.

Yes, the final step is facing your fear. Now, if you think about holding a spider in the palm of your hand; that is not what I meant.

Once you understand your fear and where it is coming from, you will be able to handle it, because you will be able to see the root cause and deal with it; and once you dealt with the root cause itself, the fear will fade away. Leave behind the things that hold you back and harness the Benefits of believing yourself.

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Techniques to overcome everyday challenges

Ever experienced challenges and, perhaps, felt lost with no particular pathway towards recovery? Learn techniques to overcome everyday challenges.

Maybe it was a common problem that wasn’t hard to endure and overcome or, conceivably a dull and grieving moment that needed a lot of time to recover, but eventually, you go back to your best. How did you cope during the challenging times and ensure that you stay happy? I share 5 Things that Keep Me Going Every Day.
We all have to go through challenges in life if we are to truly mature. In our ordinary lives, the many difficulties we typically face test our psychological mettle and culture endurance through resilience. However, to attain the mental resilience, one may go through many stressful situations to learn to handle and cope with them, without feeling down & intimidated.

And, mental strength comes with an unstoppable mindset that ought to be built with consistency and showered with victories after every obstacle is cleared. Multiple techniques could help defeat the many challenges in life, but it all depends on the mindset and how to overcome everyday challenges. 

Here are 15 tips how to overcome everyday challenges

Embrace adversities

A struggle develops character, and that’s why humans feel proud when they overcome extreme hurdles to accomplish a goal that looked extremely strenuous. Without pushing yourself to the limits and beyond, you will never know what you are capable of, and it is hard to know your hidden talents. So, when adverse situations knock, welcome them and don’t feel intimidated by their sheer occurrence.

Stay positive

While our brains focus on threats and dangers, even when they aren’t there, strive to remain positive. When you are upbeat, the hidden threats (whether they are there or not) will not topple your already stable mind. Always look for something good in everything, including challenges.

Exercise

Richard Branson’s secret to success is working out always. Scientific studies support him and show activities release hormones that enhance the mood and make one happy, even when there are massive challenges. Exercises develop self-confidence, making one energized and ready to combat any problem.

Get it done

You are standing there, facing a big problem and you know it is inevitable. Instead of thinking twice, take action and work on the solution. Think out of the box and, trust me, better results will follow.

Label your emotion

Turns out, the mere act of labelling one’s emotions makes one energetic, focussed, and self-aware of what’s happening, instead of feeling emotionally drained. According to Dr. Matthew Lieberman, such a simple activity reduces activity in the emotional part of the brain. Next time you feel overwhelmed by a problem, label your emotions and choose a new one.

Speak with confidence

Much like you must adopt a positive tone, you must learn to speak with confidence. Studies show that someone fond of using powerful and energized terms & phrases are more likely to overcome challenges, unlike someone who doesn’t speak with confidence.

Ask yourself questions

When you think about yourself as “What’s wrong with me?”, “Why can’t I do this?” or “What’s good about this situation?”, your mind will look at the problems critically and help formulate solutions. The questions will also contribute to turning your experiences into worthy memories when you face similar challenges in the future.

Stand tall

A strong body language, coupled with the right posture, powerfully impacts how the brain works. It breeds confidence of a gallant soldier and embodies the right mindset needed to fight everyday challenges.

Build a team

Success often arrives when a group is formed. So, when feeling hurt and challenged, gather your friends or relatives, and move forward. A team will not only help make the problem smaller and solvable, but also triggers progress in the brain, and you will never have to battle the hurdles alone.

Take a walk

It has been proven, there lies an innate connection between an individual and nature that fosters peace and tranquility. To better understand this, just take a walk off your normal path and head out to a public park. The serenity there will make you feel peaceful and relaxed and help you look beyond the challenges.

Step into some else’s shoes

When facing a seemingly insurmountable and challenging situation, think about what someone else would do to emerge victorious. If someone faced what you are facing right now and won, you would not be intimidated. However, you just have to think about someone who has been where you are and did what you are about to do.

Anchor it in

Remember that one period when you were upbeat and incredibly energized while facing a massive challenge? Well, clench your fist as you recall how you survived through the torrid times and combat those problems. As much as it is a mentally induced activity, your brain will slowly associate a clenched fist with courage. No problem will appear significant before you.

Make the art of solving challenges automatically

The key to defeating challenges in life is having the right mindset. When practiced regularly, positive habits slowly turn into a normal way of life. And, once everything is automatic, you will no longer spare a thought about them. All those challenges will turn into opportunities for further growth.

Meditate

One additional way of overcoming those hardships in life is to meditate. A 10-minute meditation makes you fully away of the situation and helps calm the nerves & muscles, helping you look beyond the problems. You will stay on track, focus on what’s important, and work on rectifying the unpleasant experiences.

Write a Journal

Every time you are facing a massive problem, find your journal and document everything. It works opening up to someone and often helps you pour out all the fears and emotions and, in the same manner, get over the experiences. All the bad & harmful thoughts will have been removed, leaving room for storage of pleasant memories. More useful tips here.

Comment below if you have any other tips that you to overcome everyday challenges.

Cover photo by Aziz Acharki on Unsplash