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achievement

Why don’t people reach their goals?

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One of the strongest desire we, human beings have is achieving our goals and dreams.  Well, sometimes we make all the efforts to achieve our parents’ or partners’ dreams, but if we want to be conscious about our life, we work on achieving our own dreams.

And what is a better way of achieving a dream than seeing it clearly in the mind and articulating it as a goal? Once we have our goals set, we are done, aren’t we?

Perhaps it is surprising but even though goal setting is a popular topic, various studies show that achieving goals is not a success story for all. Naturally, the number of people who achieve their goals is different in each study, but a recurring theme is that many of us abandon the goals within four weeks.

In the meantime, we hear stories of success almost every day and examples of high performers fill the pages of online and offline magazines. We all love to hear the success stories.

And we all would like to live the dream, the success story. But few of us do. What could be the reason?

As a starting point, we can talk about goal-setting. I know it is May already; we have almost reached the end of Q2. We shouldn’t talk about setting goals, right? Setting goals is part of the new year’s resolution.

Just stay with me. The way how you set your goals has a high impact on your success of achieving them.

Many like to set same or similar goals others set for themselves just to follow the “good” example. But will the same thing work well for everyone?
Others like to go for super ambitious goals just to lose the steam after hitting a barrier once or twice.
Not to mention those, who think about the first couple of steps but don’t take the time to see the challenges, the required change in context.

These are just a few examples. What we can learn from these is if we would like to see the results, we need to see where we are going and what path is going to take us there will help achieving our goals.

Think about it. It is May already. If we still didn’t achieve our goals or made visible progress, we’ll lose nothing by reviewing your goals.

Regardless of the progress they make, high performers take a look at their goals multiple times a year. This is part of their success formula.

What is the advice here?

  • Plan your six months or the year or two years with the end in mind. Think about the most important things that must happen for you to achieve your goal.
  • Think about your life and see what fits in there. You can go for ambitious goals and achieve them, if you can allocate the time and resources needed. If you cannot do that, you will struggle and eventually abandon the goal.

That links to a tricky part of goal achievement and success. Maintaining motivation so you stick with your goals.

We often use the expression losing motivation. Truth to be told, one cannot lose motivation. Although we can lose focus; or just to link back to the first aspect, goal setting, we can set unrealistic or uninteresting goals.

Let’s talk a bit more about motivation. What is motivation? What is the source of motivation? Is it within us or does it come from the environment?

Motivation is a combination of reasons why we act or behave in a certain way and a certain level of energy directed toward achieving our goals.
We may feel motivated because of an internal desire or because of external influences. Such external influence may be a reward. A reward can be material, or a recognition of our results voiced to us or shared in front of others.

When we abandon a goal, we no longer believe that achieving our goals is worth the effort. Either because we believe something else will bring about better results, or we experience problems in putting in the required effort.

So, you see. One cannot lose motivation. The motivation is there, but it is most likely redirected.

What can we learn from this?

  • Listen to the signs of your body and mind to recognise when you are about to re-prioritise. You may revise your goals intentionally, but sometimes our instant desires are stronger than us. High performers understand delayed gratification and to maintain high performance and repeated results, you need to be patient.
  • Be conscious of how you allocate your time and energy.
  • You may have more goals on your list all the time but that doesn’t mean you have to multitask. Be clear on what you need to do within a specified time period and maintain your focus. Once you are done and progressed with one topic or task as desired move to another task.
  • If you are stuck with a specific task, park it. Get on another task, so you don’t waste time. This practice will help you not only with improving your efficiency but your creativity and problem-solving, too.

Of course, success and high-performance are more complex and both depend on more than just goal-setting and motivation; and both goal-setting and motivation can be improved in many ways.

Photo from Unsplash

Inspiration for women who want to achieve more

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How do we become high achievers? Learn from successful women. Inspirational video of high achieving women.

“If your actions create a legacy that inspires others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more you are an excellent leader.”

Dolly Parton singer-songwriter

How does a woman become a high achiever?

inspirational image for high achieving women

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

First, according to a study about Harvard Business School MBA graduates, some years ago, women and men had similar values regarding their hopes for achievements in life and career.

Secondly, women rated factors such as a satisfying work that is meaningful. Also,  professional achievements and accomplishments are key dimensions of their professional lives. Furthermore, career growth opportunities and development programmes were of as much importance to them.

In addition, while some work in corporate jobs and others find job satisfaction and fulfilment in other professional areas, achievement and the desire for inspiration & growth are formed parts of our lives.

Whether we work in business, as artists or in public services, there are behavioural patterns that enable us to higher achievement. Such behavioural patterns are:

  • seeking clarity about her own self and the world around her
  • finding and generating energy in almost any situation
  • being courageous and bold, trusting her own abilities
  • continuously improving herself and her capabilities

We could continue this list, do some research and find that there are unique views on this topic. Instead, why don’t we view the following video and think about these amazing women? Moreover, every high achieving women is inspirational for their hard work, dedication and spirit. How did they do it?

Finally, get more inspiration by reading How do women do business? Also, you can learn about How do high achievers really think?

pCover Photo by Christina @ wocintechchat.com on Unsplash

How to set goals you can achieve

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4-min read

Typical goal setting mistakes and how to fix them

Various sources, methods and even apps are available to support you if you decide to set goals for yourself.

Many of us set new goals in January each year and we all try to do our best to achieve those goals.

Somewhere along the way, after a couple of weeks or months these goals seem to fade away. You turn your attention to something else, which you believe, seems to be more important. Similar may happen to other goals you set during the year.

Why did you decide to place these goals in the back of the top shelf of your mind? Was their fate to be forgotten? Which goals prove to be long lasting and achievable? Where did it go wrong and what could you have done differently? Did you use the best app?

Let me share with you the common mistakes in goal setting, and these have very little to do with an app:

  • goals are set based on an impulse;
  • you think goal setting is like writing a daily to do list;
  • goals listed as you would prepare your shopping list;
  • you can only achieve your goal by doing something you really don’t fancy;
  • you think achieving the goal will sort out your life;
  • the goal is shiny and fantastic, and it is so far from you as the moon and the stars … but when you talk about it everyone admires you for having such a great adventure ahead of you;
  • you set a goal, because your friend(s) or significant other set the very same goal and by the way they are doing quite well in achieving it;
  • you can achieve the goal when sleeping, or standing on one leg, singing a song and juggle three apples at the same time.

Probably I could extend the list with a bit more effort, but I am sure, by now you understand, goal setting is about you. Your life and your future are in your hands, you are the director of your own movie. Therefore, anything goes wrong with goal setting is on you.

Devastating, I know…

On the other hand, it might just be good news. There is freedom in accepting you have control over your life and that comes with freedom to decide and act. For more inspiration click here.

Let’s take a look at these mistakes one by one. Learn from them, so that you can embrace your newly acquired set of opportunities.

Goals are set based on an impulse

New year resolutions, unless you built a habit of them, are good examples of such goal setting. However, you may experience this phenomenon when you buy a treadmill, because you saw an inspiring video. It convinced you running is the best option for you to lose weight.

You are setting a goal in a mood for changing things quickly and/or in a hopeful moment. On the other hand, don’t think about ways of achieving it or the activities and obligations coming with it. You try to stick with it, try your best to achieve it. At the end your schedule, work, other tasks or even your hobby may cross your way. Finally, the goal you want to achieve seems to require so much effort you can’t make.

Goals listed as items on a shopping list

Shopping lists are created in different ways, some like to sit down and think what is needed for the next couple of days or for the week. Others leave little notes about the items they need to replace, replenish in the household. Alternatively some just would like to add the most obvious items and add more items while shopping to allow some creativity and flexibility around shopping. The more practical you are with your shopping list is the better for your purse probably.

What is wrong with the shopping list type of goal setting?

Basically, you list things you would like to buy, rather than to achieve/earn and you think on a short term.

I give you an example, which is coming from one of my friends. His goal list started with get a new sports car this year.

He was thinking about an item, and acquiring this item was itself the goal. Even if not within a year, but within a year and a half or two, he could finally buy the sports car and that is when the disappointment started. The sports car was great, but he couldn’t drive it as much as he wanted. Additionally by the time he got the car, he felt he could have invested the money better, and he didn’t enjoy the car as much as he thought he would.

You set goals as you would write a to do list

A to do list includes activities you plan to deliver in a day, so you define what you would like to achieve on a short term. The activities you plan are usually the ones that can be delivered easily and will not pose much challenge.

You can only achieve your goal by doing something you really don’t fancy

Doing the Ironman triathlon is an impressive goal unless you have hydrophobia, or losing 22 pounds in 2 months can be very challenging if you know you are not ready to leave your favourite foods behind and find alternatives.

You think achieving the goal will sort out your life

While losing weight, or changing your career may bring improvements to your life, hoping it will solve all your problems may cause you disappointment at the end.

Many believe they just need to change their clothes, earn big money, or have cool friends and they will change their lives. Waiting for something to happen just to start something else. This decision makes your life journey more difficult and takes you away from what you really can achieve and what really can bring you success.

You set a goal, because your friend(s) or significant other set the very same goal

Friends can show you a good example inspire you, root for you and be with you in the moments when you need them most. Doing things together is fun and strengthens your relationship, on the other hand your friend’s life is different than yours. His or her desires will be different from yours. Your friend set the goal for him or herself, believing the goal will take him or her forward, not you.

The goal is shiny and fantastic, and it is so far from you as the moon and the stars

Being a billionaire in a year, may sound ambitious and worth sharing at a party. Assuming you have surefire ways to achieve it or you are a genius who gets new revolutionary ideas quite frequently and have the talent to make things happen quickly.

Should your friends not see you this way, your goal will sound as bragging and may damage your relationships. Maybe your friends already know, you like to set big goals, which you abandon later. If that is the case and you are just fed up others not taking you seriously, you might want to change your mind about goal setting.

You can achieve the goal when sleeping, or standing on one leg, singing a song and juggle three apples at the same time

Setting a goal of being promoted this year, when you already know the promotion is on its way is not only naughty, but unhelpful in many ways.

I shared with you the most common mistakes in goal setting, so you may be curious to know the better ways of setting goals.

Let’s start with understanding how setting goals for your life is different. As you are achieving goals you put yourself on a certain track of your choice.

Talking about life path sounds more serious than just setting goals, isn’t it? Your life is very precious and you have the right to make decisions on it. Setting goals are such decisions.

If you asked me whether there are golden rules for goal setting, I would probably hesitate saying there are, because I saw many people successfully set goals in many different ways. However, there are certain guidelines to goal setting, which may help you to be better and more effective, and by more effective I mean you will feel closer to your goals and your sense of achievement will increase.

Set goals that make you feel you are going in a good direction

Setting goals helps you stay focussed and allows you to take and/or increase control over your life. It also will make you more structured and will improve your memory.

Each goal you set may or may not fit in the big picture of your life. Why not choose the ones that fit?

Once you decided the direction for your life, you can start planning the journey. Setting goals is to lay the stepping stones on the road, your goals will take you further in your journey.

Set goals that relate to your priorities and target areas in your life where you identified a gap and will aid your efforts in building your skills and improve your life situation.

Make your goals measurable

Sense of achievement comes when

  • you know what you want to deliver and how your success will look like;
  • also, you have a plan of action
  • finally, you deliver on your plan.

Goals can be defined in different ways, the more specific the definition of your goal is, the closer you may get to accomplishing it. A measurable goal will specify what exactly you want to achieve and by when. Include specific dates, volumes, or rates.

Set goals that motivate you, but don’t make you struggle

Goal achievement requires dedication and to keep progressing your motivational level needs to stay high. To achieve that you need to be convinced you can do what is needed, but delivering it will not be too easy for you either.

When you don’t have this, you risk postponing what you need to do to make the goal a reality or accomplish so easily that the goal will not give you a sense of achievement, leaving you feeling disappointed.

I set my goals in details, and include why I want to achieve the goal, where achieving it will take me and how it will help me in the future. I end up with longer sentences, but it is worth as I can keep my eye on the ball and have a check whether the goal still fits in my bigger picture of life. 

Record you goals and your progress

Writing a list of your goals, recording the deadlines you set for yourself and create a habit of looking at your goals periodically will help you maintain focus.

I personally use an app to record my goals and have a reminder each day, so the goals appear every day in the morning on my phone. This way I start every day by thinking about how much closer would I like to get to achieving my goals and what do I need to do differently if I slowed down.

Make an action plan

Develop a plan of actions in that includes the steps you want to take to achieve your goals. Depending on your preference you can create a detailed plan including every step to take, just consider how much effort will be required to maintain your plan.

A good plan is clear, simple and logical and includes just as much detail, that is necessary for you to understand and remember what the steps mean.

You can write your plan on a paper, develop it in a spreadsheet or in a project planning application, or if you are in a very creative mood you can create a visual representation of your plan.

Make things happen

Even the shiniest plan will sadly sit in the bottom of your drawer, if you don’t act on it. Create a habit of doing something, even a little thing, every single day, that takes you closer to your goal. Check back on your progress and if you slow down find and assess the reasons, and work out solutions.

Difficulties, challenges will always come into your way. Some people will be helpful, others may have priorities conflicting yours. Keep up a positive attitude and build and rely on helpful relationships. If you would like to learn more about building and maintaining helpful relationships click here.

Enjoy and celebrate the progress and small successes even

I am not saying you should throw a party every time when you could raise your workout time by 5 minutes, but remind yourself of the good job you are doing and use the achievement as a building block to the next one. Learn from professionals to make decisions easier.

Cover photo by Hannah Olinger on Unsplash