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Self-Confidence is Fundamental to Everything, But What is the Source of Self-Confidence?

fundamentals of self-confidence

If you’re here, you have at least one question on your mind that you want the answer to. Is improving self-confidence possible, and if so, how? 

If you want to get anywhere in life, doing all the things you want to do and seeing all the things you want to see, you can’t do it while missing one of the key elements which is self-confidence. One’s experiences influence one’s perception of the self. A child that has been brought up from an early age believing they can achieve anything they will tend to grow up with a generous amount of trust in their own abilities.  

Not all of us are so fortunate. Facing failure at an early age without being able to bounce back from it can lead to poor self-esteem. Our inner critic constantly uses these little incidents to make us question our self-worth. The lack of confidence can lead a person to back out from situations, growing incredibly anxious in public events, or even making mistakes in things they already know.  

However, we have all seen numerous examples showing that one’s attitude as a child does not completely determine their path as an adult. It means, there is a way to quiet that inner critic and build up one’s self-confidence as an adult. The path may be more complex at a later age, but it is certainly possible to develop and maintain higher self-confidence.  

With the right guidance, support, tools and desire to live a happier and healthier life overallyou can build a new mindset, and with that, you can change your experiences. 

For some, it may take years of practice, but eventually, we can all reach a stage where we intrinsically believe in ourselves and where we need not consciously remind ourselves of our worth.  

Basically, that is the state where you can confidently say you have a good sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Naturally, we all have our ups and downs, and we don’t feel confident all the time. Such moments, when you start questioning your abilities are also helpful, so listen to yourself. Listen to your mind. This is where it all starts. Those moments, when you waver, indicate which situations you may have trouble with, what your triggers are and which skills you need to work on.  

Building up your self-confidence might sound difficult, especially if you have very little belief in yourself right now. But after experiencing the first quick improvements, you will have something to build on. Do not underestimate small results.  

We prepared some easy to implement tips to help you start your journey and build your confidence.  

 1. Visualization

Visualize yourself as who you want to be and how your life will look like once you have more confidence You don’t have to imagine yourself all successful, be realistic and visualize the next stage of development. With time, you will and can be bolder.  

Often, we suffer from poor self-image. By imagining yourself as a confident, capable person, you can open your mind to new ways and new thinking. New ways which you are not choosing yet because you don’t believe you can do it. Experiment and keep your risks at bay.  

Are you not confident to ask for help from an experienced colleague or be a part of that project where you could prove your abilities just yet? Visualize various scenarios, practice what a confident person would say. Collect your thoughts, relevant experiences, and examples of similar situations. This is what confident people do. They rely on their past results and experiences. They rely on their skills. You have skills; we all have skills; you are no exception. The difference is that you haven’t recognized your skills yet, or you have no reference point. Find yourself the first reference point. A problem you can solve. 

Click the link to learn 5 Ways you can use relaxation and visualisation to help advance your career

2. Affirmations

We tend to beat ourselves up for the smallest of mistakes far too often, but rarely do we remember to compliment ourselves for the things we do well. When you know you are good at something, make it a point to remind yourself of that. Say it out loud, do not be shy. It is true for you; it has already been proven. You have proved it.  

It may sound strange first to hear your own voice saying, I tackled that interview and got the job I have been dreaming about. But it will give you a sense of pride and closure too. Knowing that you have accomplished something as a result of your talent and effort.  

I recall the first time I did that. I didn’t even state my achievement. Also, I said it as if it was a question.  

This method can apply to your physical insecurities as well. The next time you look into the mirror, compliment yourself. Compliment yourself out loud, for features of your appearance you are proud of. It can be anything, and you may be proud of your shapely eyebrows, nice smile, you can even compliment yourself for your hairstyle that day. 

Similarly, do not forget to compliment yourself for your mind, resilience, and perseverance. Compliment yourself for your dreams and plans. Without them, you wouldn’t make any progress. Dreams and plans are fuel to your growth.  Appreciate your own qualities with conviction, and your self-confidence will have no choice but to follow. 

3. Challenge Yourself

Do something that makes you uncomfortable. Start small, and this is not a competition. Your development and happiness are at stake. Others have no say in it. Listen to advice and opinions but know that you live your own life, and no one else lives it on your behalf. 

I know some would question this advice. Why would I start small? Why not be bold I can tell you if you ask these questions, you probably have enough self-confidence in that field, so find another challenge for yourself. 

By facing a difficult situation head-on, your heart will finally start believing that you can do anything you set your mind to.  Also remember, facing it head-on does not mean you have to rush into it. You can still craft your plan and progress at your own pace.  

4. I mentioned this already. Start Small

Often, we set ourselves on a course for a nearly unachievable aim, and when we are unable to meet it, our confidence takes a hit. Instead, break down your larger long-term aims into goals and those into smaller, short-term objectives 

After achieving your objectives, make a list of those achievements, no matter how small you believe them to be. This will help reaffirm your faith in yourself, and eventually, you will have achieved your goal as well. 

5. Personal Boundaries

It is okay to say no to other people. By setting personal boundaries and doing things that make you happy, you will be more in control of your life. Naturally, this will improve your perception of yourself.  

Follow these five techniques, and soon, you will be the person you always wished to be.  

Related articles
What does it take to be confident?
Benefits of Believing In Yourself.

 

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5 Tips to Help You Be More Successful

5 tips to be more successful

Hunger for success is natural and is in everyone. There isn’t a more uplifting feeling than when you accomplish your goals through hard work and discover your true self. Everyone wants to be more successful, but what is success? 

Although, success can be welldefined, based on the experience with our clients, it means something different to everyone. There are those who feel content in possession of lots of money. Those who own and run a business – which is what brings them joy. Some people are dedicated to personal and professional development and there are also those whose 1st priority is family – and others to whom itcaritative work 

All work for success, all in their own ways, some following their passion and others in need of a little uplifting now and then 

But what ways are there to be more successful? Here is 5 tips for you to help you be on the path of joy and success. 

Find out what success means to you. 

I am sure you heard that people who follow their passion are happier and more successful. In some sense it is true, even though passion is only one component to success. So, as a start,  find out what makes you feel happy. As soon as you have a goal, you can create the plans yourself – if you really want it.  

Then find what you like to spend time on doing and what you are good at. 

When you do something with all your heart and soul, you are moving huge energies and can achieve extraordinary things. This energy will automatically help you concentrate on creating experiences that move you forward and ease the progress to a great extent. Without a shadow of a doubt, you will be able to mobilise your energies and turn your ideas into actions. 

We all know though, that passion paired with excellence is what makes a difference, and to make an impact you need to have and utilise the right skills. 

When you are tuned into success and positive about the future, you rarely consider that success always comes at a priceExpect surprises and be open to make sacrifices. 

Depending on what success means to you and what you want to achieve or what your goals are, – you must expect to make sacrifices. We often say best things in life are free, but everything comes at a price.  If you want to spend more time with the family, you must make the time for it. If you want to progress your career, you must invest in yourself. Do you want to start a business? You need funds, new skills and time. Perhaps,  you need to save money for months or even years to start your business. 

With all the learning, the extra efforts and the work invested in, you might find that you have even less free time. The good news is that everything is temporary. I am sure you heard the phrase This too shall passOnce you reap the fruits of your labour, you will see the sacrifice was worth it. 

Surround yourself with people smarter than you.  

There are only few people in the world from who you couldn’t learn something good and new. On the way to success, you will come across and work with a lot of people. They all help you towards your goal in one way or another. Don’t be afraid to share, ask for help or cooperate. 

Never give up! 

One of the keys to success is that we do not surrender when faced with obstacles. It is one thing, of course, to know the way how to overcome the obstacles ahead, and another to implement the solution 
Many people become uncertain and hesitant when one small inconvenience arises and lose the strength to start over.  
Don’t be like themAdopt a problemsolving attitude and concentrate on finding solutions, not excuses. If you do so, not only your work will be fruitful, but others will also recognise and appreciate the resultsNot to mention the lessons that will enrich your life and the increase in your self-confidence 

You also need to understand that you are in the driving seat and hold the key to your life.  

Even if you believe there are magical influence, other people, fatal powers or coincidences which prevent you from achieving your goals, you will always have a choice and a solution, you just need to find it 

Many people don’t accomplish their goals because they are not willing to take the necessary steps, not because they are not capable enough.  
The accomplishment of your life goals may somewhat depend on luck and talent, or on your relationships, or other factors. But it definitely depends on how you handle the above-mentioned factors. 

Let the challenges be the reason why you can progress and succeed, when others may hide behind those as they fail. This is how simple it is to stand out and achieve all you want. 

Everyone wants to be more successful, but to reach success is also important to set achievable goals and learn how to track them

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10 Signs of Low Self-Confidence

image for low self-confidence post

Have you ever wondered what self-confidence truly means? I am sure you have already heard various definitions of self-confidence because it can be explained in multiple ways.  
It is trust in your abilities and talent. You have the belief that no matter what happens, you will be able to achieve your goal or solve a problem regardless of how difficult it may seem. You know you are capable of succeeding in any situation as you have the knowledge, resources and abilities. 
Another way of describing self-confidence is that we are feeling safe when we are doing our day to day tasks as we know how to execute them, however, if a new situation or problem arises, we panic or might get scared. Being able to fight this feeling and get on top of it is also defined as self-confidence.

Everyone has self-confidence.

Some more, some less. Some in a certain area, while others in different fields. Self-confidence is linked to various areas of life but higher self-confidence definitely contributes to:

  • developing the ability to establish and maintain happier relationships,
  • earning more money,
  • building more satisfying careers, and
  • generally to a more successful life.

To start your journey to a more satisfying and successful life, you have to be honest with yourself and realize whether there is work to be done with your confidence level.

Below are 10 behaviours people with low self-confidence display.

Think about the past two weeks. Do you recognise any of these in your behaviours?

  • You are hesitant or unable to accept compliments
    Instead of saying a simple `Thank you` ; as you very likely worked hard for that compliment and are deserving of it, you will say something like `Oh, it is nothing, anybody could have done it` and downplay it.
  • You worry about what other people think

You can not be yourself as you always walk on eggshells and try to please everybody around you.

Confident people do acknowledge what others might think about them, but they care about it on a healthy level as they have accepted and love themselves as they are. They consider other`s opinion when they need it and they consider their inputs in a constructive way.

  • You do not trust yourself and your judgment
    You constantly ask for others’ opinion and judgment as a support to ensure your decision is the right one. Also, you might struggle to make sound decisions as you think others know better than you. Although, let`s not forget that at times, we all lose trust in our judgement. Self-confidence is about reaching back to past success and capabilities.

  • You make excuses or blame others
    Instead of owning up to your mistakes, you blame others or make excuses. Accepting the fact that you have made a mistake might feel like a weakness to you.
  • You do not like being in charge
    People with lack of self-confidence are afraid of being in a leading position as they cannot make choices without the approval of others.
  • Take constructive feedback as criticism
    Due to not having a clear picture of their strengths, individuals with low self- confidence will take any negative feedback personally. Which will make them feel demotivated and even more unsure about their abilities.
  • Accepting or giving in to blames

You often feel like that you need to accept the blame for whatever went wrong and that it happened because of you.

As you are not self-confidence enough it is just easier to give in and take the blame than to stand up for yourself.

  • Comparing yourself with others
    Instead of concentrating on yourself and how you can succeed, you are always checking what and how other people do and achieve. Comparing ourselves to others is not a problem as long as can see it as an opportunity and we find a better way forward without feeling like a loser in the competition.
  • On some level we all compare ourselves to others
  • You back down in an argument just to please others
    You would rather keep your opinion to yourself, even if you know you are right, just to avoid conflict and keep up the peace.
  • Give up too soon

You might try something new but give it up before you would give it your best shot as you think `it will never work for me`.

If after reading these common signs, you may have just realized that you might be lacking self-confidence, you need to know that there are a lot of different factors that contribute to low self-confidence. Such as your , your bad experiences, cultural background, etc.
You also need to know that it is not your fault, and although your past cannot be changed, your self-confidence can be built back up, and there is help out there to guide you through.
It is so important to understand that if you are prepared to put some time and work into it, with the right help and tools you will be able to enjoy a more fulfilling, happier and more successful life and career.

You might like the What does it take to be confident? article what we published in this topic.

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3 Things Successful People Do Every Day

3 Things Successful People Do Every Day

3 Things Successful People Do Every Day

You must have thought about why certain people are more successful than others.

Often success is associated with achieving goals. People consider others successful when they achieve the goals they set for themselves in life and show progress. We also often believe people who we assume to be successful are happy, too. Success is often associated with happiness and money, and while most learn that money itself doesn’t bring happiness, it can definitely ease some of the challenges which help focus on self-development.

So, how can we define success?

Successful people seem content and can live in better harmony with their environment while they are moving forward with their goals.

It is worthwhile to learn and make use of some of their habits for our own success. 

Our clients, in the beginning, often believe success is about luck. In some instances, and up to a certain degree, such a belief proves to be correct. Luck can be a contributing factor; however, results more often than not come down to mindset, decisions, timing, professional and social skills and resilience.  All which you can learn. You make a difference in your mind first. This is the starting point. And probably the most challenging of all steps.

Let’s see what it is that successful people do!

They are optimistic

They always expect the best outcome and see the best in everything. It doesn’t mean they are naive. It means they want and work towards the best possible outcome in consideration of the circumstances. As a side note, I want to mention the happiest people are not those who get the best things in life. But rather those who make the best of every situation. As a matter of fact, I am not talking about people with money at all here regarding success.

Additionally, successful people are:

Willing to learn and adapt and humble about their progress.

They have a thirst for knowledge because knowledge is one of the greatest powers one can have in life. The more one masters a skill or a professional field, the more successful she becomes. Successful people work hard and smart and are tenacious.   

Last but not least, their third thing which characterises successful people is openness for constructive feedback and skill to differentiate between criticism and helpful feedback. Once they identify the constructive feedback, they change their way, they adapt to having a high sense of endurance for criticism.

They do not take criticism personally. Instead, they keep focusing on their goals. Failures and mistakes are inevitable; the question is how you react to it.

Success, therefore, is rarely down to luck and being born in a rich or successful family may give you a head start, but you have to be able to use that later in life. Look at the number of self-made success around you, and you will see, there is no better person than you to make you successful.

Dare follow your dreams, look for the best outcome and keep learning to Spend time focusing on your life and progress because that is when success comes to you!

Do you want to learn how to accelerate your development and progress in life? Check out the microlearning section on our site.

If you like the 3 Things Successful People Do Every Day article you might like the How do You Plan Your Life to Reach Your Goals?

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Change habits, not your goals

change your habits not your goals article how you can change any habits

Do you know what characterises successful people?

Their habits… Yes, they have learnt to create good/positive habits which require discipline, perseverance and patience. But as the examples show, it pays off in the end.

If your life is happy, well balanced and in harmony, and if your mind is at peace, you are healthy,  feel good in your skin and your relationships are working well,  stop reading this because you are probably doing things well in life

However, if you are not satisfied with what you are experiencing in life right now or not going in the desired direction, you need to admit,   to carry on this way means the results will be the same. Thus, you will most likely not achieve the goal you have set yourself as planned. 

What I am saying is that it is so critical that you change your habits, the way how you have been doing things. As opposed to changing the goal.

We are all different when it comes to changing habits. Some people, more than others, find it easier to change how they approach life and change of behaviours. And, in fact, some habits are more difficult to change than others. Countless research studies have shown that in order to get used to a new habit (to integrate it into our life, to love it and miss if it were gone) approximately 18-254 days are needed. This may hold you back first, but remember, you form some habits to change your life and some for a lifetime.  

There are three phases  of creating a new habit:

 

Honeymoon period:

The period of the formulation of new habits. Here we have got the momentum, the zest and enthusiasm. And our plans seem easy and achievable.

 

Dull weekdays period:

Motivation may be lower at this point and we start finding excuses. The need to maintain a new habit can become a burden. The old habits suddenly seem easier and we are tempted to go back to our old ways. This is the most critical period in the creation of a new habit. It’s a good 8dea to have someone around to show support with overcoming the obstacles. If there isn’t anyone there to support you,  I suggest you keep telling yourself: I am strong, persistent, and I can do it!

Ask yourself: Why do I exactly want this new habit? How will my life be better with my new habit? What do I lose if I go back to the old ways?  Why do I struggle to maintain the new habit?

Find answers to these questions, improve your self-awareness and increase your resilience on the way.  It all helps you to overcome the difficulties of changing your habits and increases your inner strength.

Imagine what your life will be like in 5 years time. Take a look at what you can expect if you return to your old habits. Also, consider how much better it will be to hold on and keep your new habit. 

Happens like clockwork:

If you get past the previous phase, you get closer to your goal. The fills you up to new momentum fills you up with positive experiences and increased confidence and satisfaction.  Notice the improvement and use it to fuel your motivation.

I’m not going to lie to you, you must be committed to creating good habits and especially sticking to them, and even if you sometimes give up, it is worth to pick up the pieces and go from there again because it pays off in the end.

Bonus Article: 5 tips to succesfully change your habits

Click to the link to learn Why setting a goal is important or here are some Tips how track your goals

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