Supportive relationship to a more successful life

supportive relationship will help you reach a successful life

While we all desire friends and benefit from their advice, we may not fully understand how important supportive relationship are in our lives.

People with a supportive network are likely to worry less and to be less prone to failing in their endeavours. However, it can help you towards a successful life.

A supportive friend or partner will make you feel accepted for who you are. They are comfortable sharing your success, concerns or uncertainties. Also, to find the emotional relief when you need it to be able to move on. This is an important part of a successful life.

Where supportive relationship are concerned, it is the quality, not the quantity that matters.

From your early school years through your professional life, some relationships will prove to be valuable in the long term; others may disappear. A valuable relationship is not necessarily the one that brings you short term benefits. However, it may bring some; but the one, which you feel is in-sync with your life progression at any point in time.

You may realise that your BFF who has been encouraging you since you met in high school is no longer enthusiastic about your promotion or success. She is still your friend; you care for her, she cares for you, may even give you good advice on men and intimate relationships, but may not inspire you in your professional life anymore.

Sometimes we forget that friendships are formed by two different individuals who while deeply care for each other while living their lives and fighting their battles.

Want to learn more about How to keep a supportive relationship alive?

Remember, helpful relationships come in various shapes and sizes.

Keep your eyes open. Listen to the information you receive and be open to the individuals who give you the information. It may be a piece of advice or simply an observation in the environment you are working in. If you listen, you will put the pieces of the puzzle together and benefit from the information you received. Eventually, you may even realise that the person who helped you out is someone you connect with.

Some people will not be as encouraging, and their level of support to you may depend on multiple reasons. Some reasons will be directly related to their desires or uncertainties, and not necessarily to you. And some people just don’t have what it takes to be supportive.

To surround yourself with a supportive network, you need to understand the qualities of helpful relationships.

Keep your eyes open, find the traits of healthy relationships in your interactions. Spend time with people who represent those qualities that enable a healthy relationship. On the other hand, for your benefit, try to avoid people who are unfavourable to your progression in life.

It is not going to be easy, because you may bump into unhelpful people when you least expect it, but don’t forget we all live our lives and set our priorities. The level of openness and support you experience from others will also be influenced by how one feels about himself or herself.

Below, I share skills that people, who can build and maintain helpful relationships embody.

Good listening skills

Listening is all about giving your time and attention to another person. The time of listening is not the time to figure out what you are going to tell next, or how you will respond to a comment. It is also not the time to share wisdom or advice.

It is the time when you receive information and try your best to understand what the speaker is going through.

Your attention to your family, friend or colleague will help them focus their attention on the solution. Although you previously gave them the opportunity to share a frustration without being challenged or judged. Good listening skills in work may aid your progress faster and more effectively than you imagine.

When you need a listening ear, you are likely looking for someone to validate your feelings, to feel understood.

You might have already read about active listening. It is a way of listening when you try to understand what you heard and the underlying emotions too. We are not all trained psychologists or life coaches. Most of us are not mind readers, but we can try to put ourselves in other people’s shoes when they are sharing experiences. Active listening means you reflect back what you have heard and even what you didn’t hear, but sensed by rephrasing.

Non-judgmental

As listening is all about the speaker, it naturally means you save your judgment for later. You receive and store information and attempt to approach the situation from the speaker’s point of view.

Are you able to avoid judgment when you hear something that is in conflict with your values?

Can you rely on your friend, partner, colleague, family to do the same for you?

If you feel judged, you are unlikely to share your opinion, ideas, concerns or fears and will unlikely talk about the questions that may be arising in your life.

Remember, others, similarly to you, will need a listening ear, an understanding person, and emotional support.

Not sharing unwanted advice and avoiding being directive

People who often share with you unwanted advice or tell you what you “should” or “shouldn’t” do in their opinion may not only make you feel uncomfortable. You may feel they are directive about the way you should be dealing with the issues in your life or they even make assumptions about you.

While considerate advice shared with you in a way that makes you feel respected will be helpful and aid the solution of a specific problem. You can move forward with your life, thoughtless “wisdom” may just make you more concerned or uncertain in your abilities.

Open and capable to understand other’s emotions and show compassion

Empathy is a word we often hear and sometimes don’t understand its depth. We may think feeling sorry for someone else in a bad situation is empathy; when in reality it is sympathy.

Empathy is our natural ability unless we have a difficulty feeling empathy, to share feelings or experiences. In other words you can imagine what it would be like to be in the other person’s shoes.

Empathy is an ability you can, and you’ll want to develop in yourself and a trait you may be looking for in your friends, family, working environment, and in other people wherever you go.

When you are going through difficulties or a painful experience, you would like to feel supported.

Expressing true feelings

Willingness to be vulnerable and open to others’ opinion and feedback is key to supportive relationship.

Receiving feedback, especially when it doesn’t seem to be positive to you may not be a pleasant experience, even if it is delivered in a respectful way. In such cases, taking your time to understand what the feedback means and how you can benefit from it, will help you take off the edge.

In occasions when you feel a feedback was shared with you in a hurtful way it is important to openly and respectfully express the way how you feel.

You have the opportunity to explain that you understand the feedback and are aware the intention of the speaker was not to hurt you. Even if you found what he or she said harsh or unkind. Even better to explain what you feel using specific words.

Showing you are vulnerable is a sign of authenticity; it gives you the confidence and that you stand up for yourself. It provides to the other party with the opportunity to rethink what has been shared.

Allowing yourself to show your vulnerability shows people that you care both about them and the relationship.

Able to understand and manage own emotions

While empathy is about understanding other’s emotions, emotional maturity is about understanding yourself, your emotions. It requires self-awareness and continuous learning of your inner life.

As you would expect empathy from people around you, you would like to have relationships with people with higher emotional maturity.

Let’s say you were about to go to the cinema with your friend, who is very enthusiastic about you going out together, but on the day you feel miserable and the flu coming. You call it a day and tell you can’t join, but wish her or him a good time. A friend, who is supportive, will understand what is happening to you. They might feel a bit down, because they have to go alone or find someone else to go along, but they will understand.

Effective communications skills developed day by day

We live in a world where communication is a natural part of life. It surrounds us wherever we go, and without good communication skills it is more difficult to have a successful life.

We communicate with our words, the tone of our speech and our full body. Situations may they be good or less pleasant present themselves as good opportunities to develop or communication skills.

Imagine that you have to persuade a colleague of yours to help you with your project, or your boss to recognise your good performance and give you a promotion. All these require specific communications skill which you can develop. Furthermore, with the right tools you can move your career forward.

Take responsibility for your own development and feelings. No one else can do more for you than you can do for yourself. If others see and hear that you take responsibility, they will realise that you communicate what you need without blaming others.

In your relationships, you want to surround yourself with people, who can step back, see things from your point of view. Be able to re-evaluate their actions and discuss matters in a non-judgemental way.

Know When to Let Go

Some friendships and relationships last a life long or for many years, in other cases you realise the relationship has run its course.

While every supportive relationship hits bumps now and then, those are the times when supportive behaviour and good communications skills come handy.

You know you are in a supportive relationship when you can effectively work out a misunderstanding or even a conflict. Also, you can discuss differences in a constructive way, so at the end of it, everyone leaves with a good feeling.

Don’t take it granted. If you feel you are in a good relationship, expect that people may change their opinions, their priorities, and views.

If you feel judged and misunderstood for a longer period, and your attempts to repair conflicts are not working anymore, it is probably time to learn to let go. 

Check these 5 Signs to recognize your friend is not helping your progress.

Being friends with someone doesn’t mean you have to be in close contact with them if the relationship is no longer supportive of who you are today.

The better you know yourself, the easier it will be to assess whether people and your relationships are a good fit.

Photo by Sam Manns on Unsplash

How to keep a supportive friendship long-lasting?

how to keep a supportive friendship alive

Supportive friendships are hard to find and even harder to keep them alive. Words of comfort in tough times sometimes all you need to feel good. True, supportive friends are there for you when you are feeling down to encourage you and, if needed, give you some tough love.

Although are you feeling that your old pal is ignoring you when you need them most? Do you feel that your friendship is failing because your buddy is not helpful to you? Do you want to know how you can keep a supportive friendship long-lasting?

Let’s be honest; it is quite saddening to have a friendship that’s on the rocks.

It could be that your pal has made some new friends or going through a rough patch in his or her life. Nonetheless, the essence of being true friends is for you to be able to help each other. You need someone who is supportive, non-judgmental, engaging and able to help you feel at ease.

That said, if things aren’t all rosy with your friend, there are some strategies that you can use to help him or her to be more helpful. Follow the link to check the 5 Signs that reveal your friend is not helping your progress.

Strategies to keep a supportive friendship long-lasting

  1. Spruce up your usual conversation

Perhaps your friend is ignoring you because the relationship has become a little mundane. So, shake things up when it comes to conversation. Look for interesting and fresh topics to bring up in discussion with your friend. If you always talk about video games, for instance, maybe it’s high time to switch onto career, relationships, and whatnot. It also pays to keep a little mystery in your topics. That would most certainly keep your friend engrossed in the conversation. This way, you can enhance your pal’s listening tendencies towards you, so that the next time you bring up a problem, it will not fall on deaf ears.

  1. Simply help her or him out when in need

Most vibrant friendships are all about tit-for-tat. If your pal isn’t listening to your issues or not helping out much, maybe it’s because you are not helpful yourself. Supportive friendship is a two-way street. Create a sense of family or community with your friend. Being able to assist your pal forges a relationship based on the feeling of giving and taking, not just taking all the time.

  1. Be supportive and always make him or her feel at ease.

If your friend is looking for a job, for example, try putting a good word to your boss or colleagues. It’s only this way which you will take your relationship to a whole new and exciting level.

  1. Make a habit of surprising your friend

It might seem old school, but it always works like a charm. Surprise your pal once in a while with something – from a lunch date, pair of tickets to a gift and everything in between. Well, you have to go small, lest it feels that you are buying his or her affection. Regardless of the gift, make a clear-cut point that your friend is unique and special to you.

  1. Get Together Often

It’s no secret, the key to every relationship and supporting friendship is bonding. Your friend, for one, might not feel obliged to be supportive if you seem like a stranger to him or her. So, spend more time together – perhaps go out more. Teenagers can stand to benefit from sleepovers and do homework together.

These are just but a few ways to help your friend become more helpful and keep your supportive friendship alive. The bottom line, however, is to make space in your schedule, encourage listening, and help each other out often. This way, you can cultivate a healthy, give-and-take relationship.

Follow the link to find out about more benefits of having a supportive relationship with others.

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5 Signs your friend is not helping your progress

how to spot a toxic friendship

2-min read

We all have heard of toxic relationships; perhaps you’re more familiar with that couple who fight all the time. But, did you know a toxic friendship existed too?

That’s right; we can all become victims of failing friendships. The thing is that most of us are afraid to admit that a friendship has run its course.

If you are looking to ditch a toxic friendship, here are five surefire signs that your friend is an enemy to your progress.

1. You initiate most of the contact

You don’t need a calculator to know that a friend is not helpful if you have to initiate contact most, if not, all the time. Best believe it; who texted, chatted or called first is a good barometer for a progressive friend? That is why it comes as no big surprise that one person is more invested than the other in most failing relationships.

If you want to know for sure, start off by taking a small step back to see what your friend will do. Any good friend worth having will most certainly notice your silence.

2. Your friend leaves you feeling drained

Someone who is poised to help you progress should always leave your energetic, reinvigorated, and ready to face life challenges head-on. The best way to gauge this is to make a mental note of how you feel in your friend’s company and how you feel once you’ve gone on separate ways.

Do you feel that all your internal energy has been depleted?

If so, you need to re-examine your friendship because you’re definitely in a toxic friendship. That is someone who is holding you back from achieving your full potential. The trick is to stick with supportive pals who keep you cheerful when you are together, and you’ve parted ways.

3. Your friend doesn’t add value to your life

They say great friendship is good for your immune system, but the vice-versa is also true. If you cringe even at the thought of meeting your friend, then it’s high time to cut the cord. That’s right; if you don’t feel at ease – there’s no fun left – you have to break up. Again, friendship should not be detracting; it should keep balance in your life.

4. He or she doesn’t support your life aspirations or goals

We all have ambition – and it’s a good thing. So, if your friend is critical of your ambitions, the friendship isn’t going to help you make any progress.

Does your friend make you feel guilty when you pursue your dreams?

A supportive friend always desires the best for you and would never sabotage your dreams and hopes. More over, supportive relationships are enablers to a more successful life.

5. He or she is hard to find

Non-judgmental, supportive, good listener, easy to find, and engaging – what do they have in common. That’s right; a great friend is easy to pin down especially during a crisis. If he or she constantly puts off meeting you, then you have to call it quits.

Wrap-up

A good friend is someone who adds a fair of energy and value to your life. That’s why you need to cut off friends that display any of the signs above.But once you find a true friend, it’s worth to learn How to keep a supportive friendship alive.

Photo by Yanapi Senaud on Unsplash

5 Things that Keep Me Going Every Day

2-min read

In my line of work, I often meet people who believe that success and happiness are gifts of angels softly landing on their shoulders if they pray for it, or that others are born with it.  But results are coming from a conscious and long-standing effort.

You desire it, you plan for it, you work for it without giving up. This is how you get there. Praying is the first step.  Although, I quite understand how difficult it is to keep on going every single day.

The other day, I was thinking about what keeps me motivated, and I found five thoughts that help me move forward every day and which I would like to share with you now.

  1. Life is Brilliantly Limitless
    I mean it, speaking from experience. I cannot count the number of times in my life when I thought I couldn’t do or achieve something I really wanted to. As long as I believed I couldn’t do it, I didn’t even try. Perhaps, I tried but invested in so little effort that I was ultimately doomed to fail.

Some beliefs, I brought from my family, others I developed along the way. If you think about it, we born into families and grow up with advice like go to the university, get a decent job with a decent salary, please your bosses and work your way up through the years.

We live in a bubble, in a pretty or not so pretty but well-defined glass box.

Truth is though that we live in a world of created things around us. We live in buildings designed by architects, we travel by planes built by engineers, we chat with chatbots developed by programmers. We cry or laugh watching movies dreamed and created by artists.

The world is truly limitless and constantly changing. Ripples of change every single minute; and I can not only be part of the change but can make a difference around me and through that shape life itself. I can create things others find useful, I can help others by sharing learning and advice. I can share my opinion, get others to support it and induce a change in the society. What a power in the hands of a single individual.

  1. It is the Value and not the Money

The most important in my work and my life is the value I bring in others’ lives; the way how we create it and the people I am creating it with. The positive impact we make using our resources to induce positive change and innovation, the way how we serve people.

Money is wonderful because it enables me to invest in ideas which I believe in and which may have a long-term return on investment. However, money can never replace a smile or a relief I see on fellow human beings who have just got through a difficult situation or figured out a solution to a problem that bugged them before.

  1. Excellence cannot be dismissed

Being passionate about the work we do and the services we provide is one of the primary building blocks of our progress. I get excited every time we talk about a new product or service. Just an idea of creating something that makes a difference fills me up with energy. Without passion, I am not sure how we would have pushed through difficult periods. But passion is only one element.

Excellence is about being undeniably good and constantly putting long-standing efforts in everything we do so we remain so good that we cannot be ignored. Excellence is about mastering the craft and do it with dedicated work. Excellence is hard work, and hard work is inspiring. How do women do business?

We work on products and content for our clients that make them think, make them stop for a second and give the realisation they need in that given moment.

  1. Everything happens for a reason

Even if I don’t understand why certain things happen, I know I will benefit from a particular life experience at a certain point in my life. Beautiful memories, as well as lessons, are part of life and I’d rather live a life full of experiences than wait on the sidelines and see others live it.

Experiences shape us to be who we are. I often find myself people I haven’t met before conversing with me and perhaps a couple of weeks or months later, in a situation when I most need it, the conversation just comes back and puts me on the right track. I am confident I am not the only one with such experiences. Life is amazingly mysterious.

With all that in mind, I am not telling you that we have no saying in our lives. On the contrary, I believe in cause and effect and that we make our choices throughout our lives.

And sometimes it is just not comfortable to admit something was our choice. But that is life as well, and as it might seem somewhat scary, it is liberating as well.

  1. I have a great team

Finding good people is harder than you think. Every business is different, and as a business is moving forward and growing new skill set is required. If you are lucky, like me, you are going to find people who expand with your business and who teach you on the way in return.

As an entrepreneur, I go to bed with my business and wake up with it. Some would say it is not healthy. I cannot imagine my life without being able to infuse ideas in my business and make them a reality. I am grateful for my colleagues, for their thoughts and inputs because I know this is how we can develop even better products and services. The questions on their minds will turn into solutions during our interactions and collaboration.

It’s worth to read the following article – Inspiration for women who want to achieve more